I ran into a stranger as he passed by, 'Oh excuse me please,' was my reply.
He said, 'Please excuse me too; I wasn't watching for you.'
We were very polite, this stranger and I. We went on our way and we said goodbye.
Later that day, cooking the evening meal, my son stood beside me very still. When I turned, I nearly knocked him down. 'Move out of the way,' I said with a frown. He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed, God's still small voice came to me and said, 'While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use, but the family you love, you seem to abuse. Go and look on the kitchen floor, you'll find some flowers there by the door. Those are the flowers he brought for you. He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue. He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise, you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes.'
By this time, I felt very small, and now my tears began to fall. I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said. 'Are these the flowers you picked for me?' He smiled, 'I found 'em, out by the tree. I picked 'em because they're pretty like you. I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.'
I said, 'Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today; I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.'
He said, 'Oh, Mom, that's okay. I love you anyway.'
I said, 'Son, I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family we left behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. By this time, I felt very small, and now my tears began to fall. I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said. 'Are these the flowers you picked for me?' He smiled, 'I found 'em, out by the tree. I picked 'em because they're pretty like you. I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.'
I said, 'Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today; I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.'
He said, 'Oh, Mom, that's okay. I love you anyway.'
I said, 'Son, I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'
And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than into our own family, an unwise investment indeed, don't you think?
Yes, I realize this is much like those forwards I have come to hate. It's sappy and religious and typical. But, it also made me stop and think for a minute. I had just returned home from a few days with my entire family...after which I was reminded (for about the third time in the last year) that our conversations have seemed to become stale. When I thought back on the topics my parents, siblings and I had shared over the course of three days, it dawned on my that they probably don't know me very well these days. I don't talk about work because it's become pretty obvious that they don't necessarily understand or really care. I don't talk much about my hobbies for the same reasons. And I try not to talk too much about my kids and how awesome they are. In fact, I think I spend so much time trying to come up with some neutral territory of discussion that there's really nothing interesting or personal in what's said anymore.
And I have a feeling they would agree. We're all so caught up in our tiny corner of the world. Unlike the story above, we may not be short with one another but we sure aren't taking the time or energy to truly absorb what's happening or what each of us is saying. I'm not sure if this is something that happens as we grow older. I'm a firm believer in life as a cycle. We start out completely selfish and dependent and that's exactly where we end up if we have the opportunity to grow old. I guess I never would have guessed that we shut out those who should matter most so soon in life.
Needless to say, I'm a little disappointed and unsure of how to initiate change...to reverse the deteriorating bond my family has.