Friday, June 25, 2010

Losing spirit.

I was raised Lutheran, although we weren't always frequent church-goers. I joined the Catholic faith after my husband and were married...after much studying and debate. And while we used to frequent weekly mass, the last two years have really been sporadic.

I think about it often. And every Sunday, I have a sense of guilt that lasts most of the day. The other morning while I was running past the church, I had been reflecting on the pages from Eat, Pray, Love that I had read the night before (much of the intro is about faith and meditation), and I had revelation.

While I do believe in God, I realized that those forty-five minutes we were spending each week at mass did much more than remind us to keep God in our lives...it was time that I used to clear my head. Meditate. Apologize. Clear the slate. And while there is no guarantee that it will get me closer to Heaven, that time does give my heart and soul a therapy session. I can honestly say that I feel meaner, more judgmental...colder...when I skip that special time.

Call it the devil, or just human nature's jealous self soaking into my soul but I believe that quite possibly, not taking time to reflect on our behaviors or consciously remind ourselves of the type of person we're striving to be, that we do slowly become bad people.

Doesn't matter if you need a church, a yoga class or a quite corner in your house, we all need some spiritual cleaning...perhaps even on a weekly basis.

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